To those who love criticize the government
will feel great and love this one.
Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.
The first man was an Engineer,
The second man was an Accountant,
The third man was a Chemist, and
The fourth man was a Government Employee.
The first man was an Engineer,
The second man was an Accountant,
The third man was a Chemist, and
The fourth man was a Government Employee.
To show off, the Engineer called his cat,
"T-square, do your stuff." T-square pranced over to the desk,
took out some paper and pen and promptly drew a circle,
a square, and a triangle.
Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.
Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.
But the Accountant said his cat could do better.
He called his cat and said, "Spreadsheet, do your stuff." Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies.
Everyone agreed that was good.
Everyone agreed that was good.
But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, "Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured Exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop into the glass.
Everyone agreed that was pretty good.
Everyone agreed that was pretty good.
Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, "What can your cat do?"
The Government Employee called his cat and said, "CoffeeBreak, do your stuff."
CoffeeBreak jumped to his feet.......
The Government Employee called his cat and said, "CoffeeBreak, do your stuff."
CoffeeBreak jumped to his feet.......
Ate the cookies........
Drank the milk.....
Sh*t on the paper.......
Drank the milk.....
Sh*t on the paper.......
Screwed the other three cats........
Claimed he injured his back while doing so.
Claimed he injured his back while doing so.
Filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions.......
Put in for Workers Compensation..................and
Went home for the rest of the day on sick leave............
Went home for the rest of the day on sick leave............
AND THAT, MY FRIEND IS WHY EVERYONE WANTS TO WORK FOR THE GOVERNMENT!!
Thanks David
I LOVE this post, Odie! A great story,and you illustrated it even better! How did you get all the gifs to work so well on there, when I save gif pics, they turn out to be plain flat ones!
ReplyDeleteYou are a genius. Happy lst day of July!
It would be funny if it weren't so true. And now we have more people on the dole then we have working for private business.
ReplyDeleteI was just lucky, Bunny. It might be because I have Blogger in Draft.
ReplyDeleteKristin, I believe that is quite true.
ReplyDeleteIt's bad enough, but this cat is going to want milk and cookies for the rest of his life.
ReplyDeleteAhh,, A feline fulough for the federal fuck on our funds.
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the U.S. of Greece.
Opie, that's right ... and guess who's going to pay for it?
ReplyDeleteChristopher, U.S. of Greece is right.
ReplyDelete