Thursday, May 25, 2017

The AMA Weighs In


Subject: The American Medical Association's Reaction To Trump's Revised Obama Care

This is important medical information. Be sure to share with your medical professionals.

The American Medical Association has weighed in on Trump's proposed health care package to replace Obama-care:

The Allergists were in favor of scratching it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

The Gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it, but the Neurologists thought the Administration had a lot of nerve.

Meanwhile, Obstetricians felt certain everyone was laboring under a misconception, while the Ophthalmologists considered the idea shortsighted.

Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!" while the Pediatricians said, "Oh, grow up!"

The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while the Radiologists could see right through it.

Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing and the Internists claimed it would indeed be a bitter pill to swallow.

The Plastic Surgeons opined that this proposal would "put a whole new face on the matter."

The Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but the Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea.

Anesthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas, and those lofty Cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.

In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the assholes in Washington!

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Harrrrrmoooony!



Heading home this morning. All good things must
come to an end. Meanwhile, enjoy Noteworthy.
 

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

THE COW, THE ANT, AND THE OLD FART




A cow, an ant and an old fart are debating 
on who is the greatest of the three of them.
 
The cow said, "I give 20 quarts of milk 
every day and that's why I am the greatest!"
 
The ant said, "I work day and night, 
summer and winter, I can carry 52 times my 
own weight and that's why I am the greatest!"







Why are you scrolling down?
It's your turn to say something.
 
Thanks David

Monday, May 22, 2017

Woodsterman Turns 8 Today






My First Post "Dangerous Butterfly" (LINK)

That Same Month "Chinese Recall" (LINK)

My First May Again "Viagra Workout" (LINK)

One of My Favorites "Girl Dancing" (LINK)


I was looking for a few more but couldn't find them. I knew not tagging these things would come around to bite me in the ass. 

The reason the older videos were so small is I uploaded them to Blogger instead of embedding them from YouTube. It was really a learning process back then.

Once again, THANK YOU!


 

Sunday, May 21, 2017

The Toast



John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me Life, between the legs of me wife!"

That won him the top prize at the local pub for the best toast of the night!

He went home and said to his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the Best toast of the night."

She said, "Aye, did ye now. And what exactly was your toast?"

John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife."

"Oh, that is so very nice indeed, John!” Mary said.

The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on a street corner.  The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary."

She responded, "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been in there twice in the last four years. Once I had to pull him by the ears to make him come, and the other time he fell asleep."


Thanks David

Friday, May 19, 2017

The Accident



A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot.

The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, however, your penis was severed in the accident and we couldn't find it."

The man groans, but the doctor goes on, "You have $9000 in insurance compensation coming and we now have the technology to build a new penis. They work great but they don't come cheap. It's roughly $1000 an inch." The man perks up.

So, the doctor says, "You must decide how many inches you want. But understand that you have been married for over thirty years and this is something you should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before and you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed. It's important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision."

The man agrees to talk it over with his wife. The doctor comes back the next day, "So, have you spoken with your wife?"

"Yes I have," says the man.

"And has she helped you make a decision?"

"Yes" says the man.

"What is your decision?" asks the doctor.

"We're getting granite counter tops."


Thanks David

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Tuesday, May 16, 2017