Thursday, June 30, 2011


Polk County , Florida Sheriff
You kill a policeman it means no Miranda
negotiations...nothing but as many bullets as we can shoot into

An illegal alien, in Polk County , Florida , who got pulled over in a
routine traffic stop, ended up "executing" the deputy who stopped him.
The deputy was shot eight times, including once behind his right ear at
close range. Another deputy was wounded and a police dog killed.  A
state-wide manhunt ensued.

The murderer was found hiding in a wooded area.  As soon as he took a
shot at the SWAT team, officers opened fire on him.  They hit the guy 68

Naturally, the liberal media went nuts and asked why they had to shoot
the poor, undocumented immigrant 68 times.

Sheriff Grady Judd told the Orlando Sentinel:  "Because that's all the
ammunition we had."  Now, is that just about the all-time greatest
answer or what!

The Coroner also reported that the illegal alien died of natural causes.
When asked by a reporter how that could be, since there were 68 bullet
wounds in his body, he simply replied:  (BEST QUOTE of 2009) . . . "When
you are shot 68 times, you are naturally gonna die."

Monday, June 27, 2011


 Have you heard of "Penis Envy"? This is similar . . .
 Cute doesn't always make up for stupid.
 Oldster . . . I feel your pain!
I saved the best for last . . .
Stopsign, I didn't use yours, I had a better one.

Thanks David and Stopsign (H/T)

Sunday, June 26, 2011


 See the "S" under his knee? That stands for "Stupid".
 YUP! Plastic melts over an open flame.
 Don't worry folks ... I think this a "Doggy break / traffic jam" . . . OR
 Hey Buddy !
Have you ever seen a dog chase his tail?
This is what happens if he were to catch it.

Thanks David and Stopsign (H/T)

Saturday, June 25, 2011

I Ran Into an Old Friend of Ours Today . . .

He was one of my first followers, and I followed him back
to his blog. He is probably the single biggest reason I know
most of you. I've known him for two years but until today
we had never met. He is the one that is most responsible
for my hunger for your Conservative Blogs. 

You all know him as Nickie Goomba, and he'd been
threatening to visit me at one of our Arts and Craft Shows.
Nickie, thank you and I wish We'd had a lot more time.

How about some BUMPER STICKERS . . .

Thanks David !

Friday, June 24, 2011

NewsBusted 6/24/11 ~


This time of year my schedule is quite full as some
of you know. This weekend is our first show of the
season. This morning will be the most hectic of all
the days, as we'll be trying to get the kinks out.
Everything will be preposted, but the rub will be I
might have to leave before "NewsBusters" posts. 
If I can't post it this morning, I'll try this evening.

Have a good weekend all, and wish me and our
economy luck.
 "Let's see how fast we need to go before he takes off."
 "OK, I'm ready for that hard right turn ahead."
 "OK, tighten up the wench line and my foot will get er out."
 Now that's a LINEMAN !
Is this one off those great redneck inventions?

Thank You David and Stopsign (H/T)

Thursday, June 23, 2011


 I'm singin' in the rain ....
 Officer, it's right here in my . . .
 Hey Lady !
This is nothin', wait til they come back and they're full.
 Who had the tape measure last?

Thank You David and Stopsign (H/T)

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Dear Abby :

My husband has a long record of money problems. He runs up huge 
credit-card bills and at the end of the month, if I try to pay them off, 
he shouts at me, saying I am stealing his money. He says pay the 
minimum and let our kids worry about the rest, but already we can 
hardly keep up with the interest.
Also he has been so arrogant and abusive toward our neighbors that 
most of them no longer speak to us. The few that do are an odd 
bunch, to whom he has been giving a lot of expensive gifts, running 
up our bills even more.
Also, he has gotten religious. One week he hangs out with Catholics 
and the next with people who say the Pope is the Anti-Christ, and 
the next he's with Muslims.
Finally, the last straw.
He's demanding that before anyone can be in the same room with 
him, they must sign a loyalty oath. It's just so horribly creepy! 
Can you help?

Lost in DC

Dear Lost:

Stop whining, Michelle.
You can divorce the jerk any time you want. 
The rest of us are stuck with him for two more years!

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

NewsBusted 6/21/11 ~

I'll give him an "A" for effort, but he's no Jodi.

Monday, June 20, 2011

My Father's Day Quiz ...

Please excuse the photo. For some reason my computer
decided it didn't want to see the scanner any more. It will
be a work in progress, but the iPhone camera worked.

Ready for your Quiz ?

Hope you Fathers had a great day yesterday.

The Problem With Really Big Screen TVs

Sunday, June 19, 2011

I'm a Man and I Can Fix That . . . More Again

 Is this before or after raking the yard?
 Shocking . . . simply shocking !
 It's OK there's an alarm
Something is very wrong here . . . That's not duct tape.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Girls and Guns . . . or Rule 5 Woodsterman Style

Guns are great !
Boobs are Great !
Guns shaking Boobs are Greater !

Friday, June 17, 2011

NewsBusted 6/17/11 ~

Splinters in Her Crotch

A woman from Los Angeles who was a tree hugger, a liberal Democrat, 
and an anti-hunter, purchased a piece of timberland near Colville, WA.

There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the tract. She 
wanted a good view of the natural splendor of her land so she started to 
climb the big tree. As she neared the top she encountered a spotted owl 
that attacked her.

In her haste to escape, the woman slid down the tree to the ground and 
got many splinters in her crotch. In considerable pain, she hurried to a 
local ER to see a doctor. She told him she was an environmentalist, a 
democrat, and an anti-hunter and how she came to get all the splinters.

The doctor listened to her story with great patience and then told her 
to go wait in the examining room and he would see if he could help her.

She sat and waited three hours before the doctor reappeared.

The angry woman demanded, "What took you so long?"

He smiled and then told her, "Well, I had to get permits from the 
Environmental Protection Agency, the Forest Service, and the 
Bureau of Land Management before I could remove old-growth 
timber from a "recreational area" so close to a waste treatment facility. 
I'm sorry, but due to Obama-Care they turned you down!"

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

NewsBusted 6/15/11 ~

When you watch this newest of Jodi's work,
you'll understand, as I do, why shes late. OK,
"Let's get started" on those Weiner Jokes.

I'm a Man and I Can Fix That ... Again and Again

Plastic ties? Keep that away from OHSA
 Going to the store ... cart is empty.
 I have a feeling that handle is going to arc.
 Are those really Lego's

Thanks David

Monday, June 13, 2011

The News . . . . Woodsterman Style

I saw this Weiner photo over at The War Planner,
I knew I'd seen it before . . . .
And then there's this News Reel . . .

This is from "There's Something About Mary."