Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Onions and Christmas Trees


A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, 
"Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?"

The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there are 
three kinds of boobs.  In her 20s, a woman's are like 
melons, round and firm.  In her 30s to 40s, they are
 like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.  
After 50, they are like onions."

"Onions?"

"Yes, you see them and they make you cry."

 
         This infuriated his wife and daughter so the 
daughter said,  "Mum, how many kinds of "willies" 
are there?" The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, 
"Well, dear, a man  goes through three phases.  
In his 20's, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard.  
In his 30s and 40s, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable.  
After his 50s, it is like a Christmas tree."

"A Christmas tree?"

"Yes.  The tree is dead, and the balls are just for decoration."

Thanks Dan !

*** Jodi is late and I can no longer wait.

12 comments:

Adrienne said...

BwaaaaaaaaaHaaaaaaaa!!!

Sandee said...

Bwahahahahahahaha. I love this one Odie. It's probably pretty true too.

Have a fabulous day. ☺

Ron Russell said...

Speak for yourself Odie!

edutcher said...

And the son then asks, "Why does Mommy smell like a dead fish sometimes?".

doubletroubletwo said...

LMAO!

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Adrienne, Don't get mad, just get even.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Sandee, All of it?

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Ron, Not me, I'm a coward.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Edutcher, You should quit while you're behind.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

2T2, We have too huh.

cube said...

Equal opportunity offense. I like that.

USA_Admiral said...

Yikes. Neither one of these is a great image of age.