Saturday, December 14, 2019

Flight Attendant ~OR~ Rule 5 Woodsterman Style

A businessman in the first-class cabin decided to chat up the drop-dead, gorgeous flight attendant:  "What is your name?" 

Flight Attendant:  "Angela Benz, sir.” 

Businessman:  "Lovely name ... any relation to Mercedes-Benz?" 

Flight Attendant:  "Yes sir, very close." 

Businessman:  "How close?" 

Flight Attendant:  "Same price."

Thanks Hal!

Other Flying High Rule 5 ers:


  1. When I've flown I have never had a stewardess this drop dead gorgeous. All I get are attendants that have been around since just after Orville took his first flight...

  2. The stews will get you for that one.

  3. Cederq, you really need to fly Woodsterman Airlines in the future.

  4. edutcher, I'm always on someone's shit list. Take the Blonde when I post about nurses for instance.

  5. Stop me if you've heard this one.

    Feb 28, 1979, I'm moving from Pittsburgh (at -40 with wind chill) to Phoenix (80 degrees as I found out on arrival) by one of the airlines. My pals were already there so I shipped most of my stuff ahead of time. At departure time, I was down to a small carry on that contained various items including a Dan Wesson .357 with 5 inch barrel and a box of 50. Going through the check in and boarding process they asked if I had anything to declare. I said yes, I have a pistol in my carry on. They shuttled me off to a side room where I was questioned by a Pennsylvania state trooper (Airport security in those days)
    He is there and I am assuming also the head airline stewardess (a tall good looking black girl in her 30's)
    So, the Trooper is asking my about this pistol. I mean it was a real Dirty Harry looking thing. He takes it out and is admiring it and says "Feels good". I said "Very accurate too, I can hit a 5 gallon can at 100 yds with it". He says "That's impressive". I said "Thanks". In the meantime the stewardess is dancing around like she needs a restroom and with a sour look on her face like "Your Not Going to Let him On With This Thing are you?"
    So after checking the cylinder for being unloaded, he asks "Do you have any ammunition for it?" I said "Yes there is a box of 50 right here." (The carry on measured like 2 feet by 2 1/2 feet by 6 inches deep). The Stewardess looks like she wants to crawl out of her skin at this point.
    Trooper says "Do you mind if the airline crew put this luggage in the Pilot's closet?" I said "No, as long as it gets to Phoenix with me". (The pilot's closet was near the cockpit but still in the passenger cabin area)

    So, Off we go. Crappy little carry on in the pilot's closet.

    It was my first flight and it was pretty darn empty too, and as it happens, one of the stewardesses (different one) sat on the armrest of the aisle seat in the row in front of my seat and talked to me the Entire 4.5 hours it took to get to Phoenix from Pittsburgh. First Flight - I thought, Well this must happen a lot on flights without a lot of passengers.

    Later I realized they were keeping a close eye on me. But dang she was a looker. I would have asked her out but I had little cash, and no transportation of my own in Phoenix as I as moving to try to remedy that situation.

    I now wonder who and when was the last passenger to be allowed to carry on a weapon.

    Thought you might like the story.

  6. the rental prices on a Mercedes-benz are not all that bad, considering what you're getting.

  7. Kid, and they used to teach shooting skills in schools. They have since allowed liberal women to vote.


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