Thursday, May 28, 2015

Pondering . . . .



I'm not saying let's go kill all the stupid people. 
I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels 
and let the problem work itself out.
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I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People 

move out of the way much faster now.
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You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her 

hands. If they are holding a gun, she's probably angry.
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Gone are the days when girls used to cook like 

their mothers. Now they drink like their fathers.
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You know that tingly little feeling you get when 

you really like someone? That's common sense 
leaving your body.
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I don't like making plans for the day because then 

the word "premeditated" get's thrown around 
in the courtroom.
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I didn't make it to the gym today. 

That makes five years in a row
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I decided to change calling the bathroom the John 

and renamed it the Jim. I feel so much better saying 
I went to the Jim this morning
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Dear paranoid people who check behind shower 

curtains for murderers; if you find one, what's your plan?

18 comments:

  1. You know that tingly little feeling you get when
    you really like someone? That's common sense
    leaving your body.


    Amen, Odie.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People
    move out of the way much faster now.


    The solution to traffic jams in Northern Virginia!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I love them all Odie. Some more than others like that first one.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

    ReplyDelete
  4. Chris Matthews is insane! Other than that, It's good to have a normal website like this. Thank you, Odie. :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Just don't toot that horn close to a police car!

    ReplyDelete
  6. What makes you think stupid people read warning labels?

    ReplyDelete
  7. Race, oh I'm sorry. I guess that happens when you get older.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Sandee, that first one is my favorite too.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Trailbee, "normal" ... where did I go wrong?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Edutcher, good point, but not useful to this post.

    ReplyDelete
  11. The Marines say to have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
    Implementation is going to max out my credit cards!

    ReplyDelete
  12. It's comforting to know I have common sense to lose it...

    ReplyDelete

Put it here ... I can't wait to read it. I have the Captcha turned OFF but blogger insists it be there. You should be able to bypass it.

*** Moderation has been added due to Spam and a Commenter a little too caustic. I welcome comments, but talk of killing and racist (or even close to racist) are not welcome.