Friday, May 31, 2024

The Younger Woman ~ Woodsterman Style

 After 37 years of marriage. Jake dumped his wife for his Young secretary.

His new girlfriend demanded that they live in Jake and Edith's multi-million dollar home and since the man's lawyers were a little better he prevailed.

He gave Edith his now ex-wife just 3 days to move out. She spent the 1st day packing her belongings into boxes crates and suitcases.

On the 2nd day she had to movers come and collect her things.

On the 3rd day she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight put on some soft background music and feasted on a pound of shrimp a jar of caviar and a bottle of Chardonnay.

When she had finished she went into each and every room and stuffed half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of all of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend all was bliss for the first few days.

Then slowly the house began to smell. They tried everything cleaning mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere.

Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters during which they had to move out for a few days and in the end they even replaced the expensive wool carpeting. NOTHING WORKED.

People stopped coming over to visit. Repairman refused to work in the house.

The Maid quit.

Finally they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later even through they had cut their price in half they could not find a buyer for their stinky house.

Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls. Finally they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house has been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.



  1. May Trump find that much justice. Good for her!

    1. Justin_O_Guy, let's help him with that.

    2. I'm doing what I Know to do. And when I Can, I pray for the hearts of his enemies to be changed. I'm not always able to do that. That's on me.

    3. Agreed.
      You all be safe and God bless.

    4. Justin_O_Guy, do they have hearts to change?

    5. LindaG, it's pure evil out there.

    6. Well, Odie,that is a more complicated thing than such a short question Ottsta be. Yeah, they have hearts,but can my prayer get God to Act On those cold hearts? I'm not aware of any place in the Bible where a person not directly involved asked God to touch the heart of someone so that they would stop hating on someone else. AFAIK, if change is going to be made, the person needs to want to be changed and has to be remorseful for Who they Are and tearfully ask for that change and forgiveness.
      But someone I know who was having problems with people at work being less than fair did some praying and forgiving and things changed for her. So, maybe Trump needs to pray for his enemies? Hmm,that has a familiar ring to it,, dunnitt?
      I tried to treat your question more like a snappy comeback,, but it keeps gnawing at me. I'm ready for the answer if you or anyone else has some input.

  2. Variations on a theme. The other is a portrait with the wife festooned with jewelry.

  3. Oh my gosh! A woman after my own heart. God bless her!

  4. Variation on a theme. Another has the wife commissioning a portrait festooned with jewelry.

  5. I have a friend who was mistreated by a landlord in the South. He took 10# of frozen hamburger patties and put them everywhere, from floor registers to above ceiling tiles.
    He never found out what happened, but I can imagine it was not pretty.

    1. Pigpen51, he's luucky the landlord didn't press charges.

  6. Chocolate milk in the ceiling insulation...


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