Wednesday, February 16, 2022



Date: 2011-11-27, 1:43 am. E.S.T.

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.

I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings.

I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.

First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket..

The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend was happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat Marine in Afghanistan .. She had just bought me that Kimber Custom Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening.

Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!

I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with crap in your pants.

I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. (That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again).

After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely grateful!

I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]

I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ..... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.

Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).

In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime.

I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life..

Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day!

Thoughtfully yours, Semper fi,


Thanks Paul!


  1. Haha. Just great. :)

    God bless, Odie. :)

  2. Worked with Marines and they can be unfailingly polite.

    Had an Israeli Defense Forces friend who was in IDF Special Forces; knew him from Krav Maga. Home on leave here in Seattle he and a date were walking downtown when a guy pulled a knife on them. My friend disarmed the scumbag but, in the process, broke the guy's arm and got a slight cut on his own arm. Very sloppy technique. Tsk tsk. And worse the girl was so freaked out the date ended right then and there, well, after the cops questioned them and told them to go...

    But he was able to join a group of us at a nearby bar just after, so not a total loss. And he kept the knife!

    1. Rickvid in Seattle, it's stories like yours that bring a tear to my eye.

  3. Awesome story. The problem is going to get a lot worse before it gets better. Unfortunately, they ruin their neighborhoods then migrate to nicer areas and ruin those areas as well.

    1. I'm originally from KC. I saw it happen to my old neighborhood. It's now "the 'hood" and instead of well-kept houses and virtually no crime it has overgrown lawns, busted windows, no screen doors, and shootings and muggings nearly every day. Pathetic. The largest shopping mall in KC was abandoned and finally razed due to 'White Flight'.

  4. Can't we do this to all libtards? Start with the media people.

  5. This reminds me of the Crocodile Dundee "That's not a knife" scene in New York city.

  6. I like reading that one every time I see it. I wonder if we will ever hear what happened to the perp?

    1. Jeff, I doubt it, but it sure is fun using our imaginations.


Put it here ... I can't wait to read it. I have the Captcha turned OFF but blogger insists it be there. You should be able to bypass it.

*** Moderation has been added due to Spam and a Commenter a little too caustic. I welcome comments, but talk of killing and racist (or even close to racist) are not welcome.