Sunday, July 28, 2013

Senior Test . . .




Something for seniors to do to keep 
those "aging" grey cells active!

1. Johnny 's mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May. ...What was the third child 's name?

2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall and he wears size 13 sneakers. ...What does he weigh?

3. Before Mt. Everest was discovered,  ...what was the highest mountain in the world?

4. How much dirt is there in a hole  ...that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?

5. What word in the English Language  ...is always spelled incorrectly?

6. Billy was born on December 28th, yet his birthday is always in the summer.  ....How is this possible?

7. In California , you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. ...Why not?

8. What was the President 's Name... in 1975?

9. If you were running a race,  ...and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?

10. Which is correct to say,...  "The yolk of the egg are white" or "The yolk of the egg is white"?

11. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field,  ....how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?
   
 
 
   
Here are the Answers

1. Johnny 's mother had three children. The first child was named April The second child was named May. What was the third child 's name?

Answer: Johnny of course

2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall, and he wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh?

Answer :  Meat.

3. Before Mt. Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain in the world?

Answer:  Mt. Everest; it just wasn 't discovered yet. [ You 're not very good at this are you?]

4. How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?

Answer:  There is no dirt in a hole.

5. What word in the English Language is always spelled incorrectly?

Answer:  Incorrectly

6. Billy was born  on December 28th , yet his birthday is always in the summer. How is this possible?

Answer:  Billy lives in the Southern Hemisphere

7. In California , you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?

Answer:  You can 't take pictures with a wooden leg. You need a camera to take pictures.

8. What was the President 's Name in 1975?

Answer: Same as is it now -  Barack Obama [Oh, come on ...]

9. If you were running a race, and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?

Answer:  You would be in 2nd. Well, you passed the person in second place, not first.

10. Which is correct to say, "The yolk of the egg are white" or "The yolk of the egg is white"?

Answer:  Neither, the yolk of the egg is yellow [Duh]

11. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?

Answer:  One. If he combines all of his haystacks, they all become one big one.
 
 
IMPOSSIBILITIES IN THE WORLD
1) You can't count your hair.
2) You can't wash your eyes with soap.
3) You can't breathe through your nose when your tongue is out.
Put your tongue back in your mouth, you silly person.
 
 
Ten (10) Things I know about you.
1) You are reading this.
2) You are human.
3) You can't say the letter ''P'' without separating your lips.
4) You just attempted to do it.
6) You are laughing at yourself.
7) You have a smile on your face and you skipped No. 5.
8) You just checked to see if there is a No. 5.
9) You laugh at this because you are a fun loving person & everyone does it too.
10) You are probably going to send this to see who else falls for it.
 
You have received this e-mail because I didn't want to be alone in the idiot category.

Life is good!
(thanks David I think)

Did you really think we were done with cow's asses?

24 comments:

Always On Watch said...

Off topic....You have been NOMINATED! Participate or not -- your call.

USA_Admiral said...

The idiot category seems to be filling up very quickly.

Supi said...

Thought it was Barry back in '75.

Ron Russell said...

I would have enjoyed those, but am really pissed that you put my picture at the top. I emailed that in confidence>

Sandee said...

Bwahahahahaha. These were all very good. Well except for the cows butt. I've had enough of that.

This was so good I added you to my Silly Sunday linky.

Have a fabulous day. ☺

LL said...

I saw the caption discussing the cow's ass. I thought that it was a picture of Michelle -- then I realized, "it is a cow".

Opus #6 said...

OK, I'm smiling. Your post worked.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

AOW, Do I dare ask for what?

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Admiral, we need to get more places to hold them.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Supi, you won the grand prize. Send a certified letter to the management of the contest to claim your prize.

Always On Watch said...

Odie,
It's an award for Influential Blogger.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Ron, I'm sorry. I thought you were proud of that photo. That's why I plastered it all over Google.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Sandee, thanks. I was going over there to do the same.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

LL, I agree ... what's the difference?

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Opie, then I've done my job.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

AOW, Me? LOL

Always On Watch said...

Odie,
Well, you ARE an influence -- what kind exactly I haven't said. Hehehe.

Mr. AOW said...

Odie,
You've been nominated again! By me! Hahaha.

edutcher said...

As they say in the comic books, "Arrrggghhhh!!!".

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

AOW ... watch it. hehehe.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Mr, Oh sure, yous guys is gonna make me work.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

edutcher ... yup, "Arrrggghhhh!!!"

Abelle | The Wows! And Oops! Of Life said...

I got 8 correct answers out of 11. Not bad, huh?

The 'Impossibilities' and 'Ten Things' got me. Aarrghh! Silly me.

Just Silly Sunday-ing from the Philippines! ;o)

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Abelle, welcome to the insanity that is Woodsterman.