Wednesday, January 17, 2018

Headaches . . . .



Joe had suffered from bad headaches for the past 20 years and eventually decided to go and see a doctor about it.

The doctor said: “Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press on your spine and the pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles.”

Joe was shocked and became depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He had no choice but to go under the knife. The surgery cost him $15,000. When he left the hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself.

As he walked down the street, he realised that he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life.

He saw a men's clothing store and thought: ‘That’s what I need, a new suit.’ He entered the shop and asked the salesman to tailor a new suit.

The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, “Let's see ... size 44 long.”

Joe laughed, “That's right, how did you know?”

“Been in the business 60 years,” the tailor replied.

Joe tried on the suit and it fitted perfectly.

As Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, “How about a new shirt?”

Joe thought for a moment and then said, “Sure.”

The salesman eyed Joe and said, “Let's see, 96cm chest and 42cm neck.”

Joe was surprised, “That's right, how did you know?”

“Been in the business 60 years,” he replied.

Joe tried the shirt and it fitted perfectly. Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, “How about some new underwear?”

Joe thought for a moment and said, “Sure.”

The salesman said, “Let's see... size 36.”

Joe laughed, “Ah ha! I got you! I've worn a size 34 since I was 18 years old.”

The salesman shook his head, “You can't wear a size 34. A size 34 would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache.”

 Thanks Dan

8 comments:

Curmudgeon said...

That would make a terrific script for an underwear commercial and a warning to anyone to always get a second opinion from another doctor. Hee hee.

edutcher said...

Good news is castrate is not impotent.

Adrienne said...

I can remember saying almost (but not quite) the same thing to the guy that lives with me when I insisted he should be wearing 36's, not 34's. And.........wait for it, he said something like, "But I've always worn 34's."

"Um, dear - you need a large box for the package."

Sandee said...

Bwahahahahahahahahaha. Love this.

Have a fabulous day, Odie. ☺

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Curmudgeon, yes we know him as Doctor Taylor.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

edutcher, not indeed.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Adrienne, too much information.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Sandee, it really caused me to laugh out loud when I first read it.