Sunday, November 1, 2015

Great Quotes of a Sexual Nature ~ Well What Did You Expect Here?

"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase 
sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these 
is the Mercedes-Benz 560SL." 
*Lynn Lavner

"Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. 

The other eight are unimportant." 
   *George Burns 

"Women might be able to fake orgasms. 

But men can fake a whole relationship."
   *Sharon Stone

"My mother never saw the irony in calling 

me a son-of-a-bitch."
   *Jack Nicholson" 

Clinton  lied. A man might forget where he parks or where 

he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is." 
  * Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady)

 "Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to 

rip out a man's genitals through his wallet."
  * Robin Williams

"Women need a reason to have sex. 

Men just need a place" 
   *Billy Crystal

"According to a new survey, women say they feel more 

comfortable undressing in front of men than they do 
undressing in front of other women. They say that women 
are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful."
   *Robert De Niro

"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that 

many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. 
They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
   *Dustin Hoffman

"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men 

think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked !"
    *Jerry Seinfeld

"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, 

and only enough blood to run one at a time."
   *Robin Williams

"It's been so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten 

who ties up whom." 
   *Joan Rivers

"Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural 

experiences money can buy."
   * Steve Martin

 " You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get 

older. Little things like being spanked every day by a 
middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay good money for in later life."
  * Elmo Phillips

" Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."
   *Oscar Wilde

" It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married."
   *George Burns


Curmudgeon said...

I still get a good chuckle out of Former First Lady Barbara Bush's quote. Would I sound pretentious to you if I said I agree with the first quote you posted?

Enjoy your Sunday Odie. GO NINERS!

LL said...

These are sentiments that we can all agree on no matter our background. Of course, the older you are, the truer they are.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Curmudgeon, that first one is the truest of the bunch!

YES ... GO 49ers!!!

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

LL, very Truer.

Sandee said...

Bwahahahahahahahahaha. They are all great, but that first one is spot on.

I linked you to Silly Sunday.

Have a fabulous day Odie. ☺

edutcher said...

Of course Oscar Wilde had all kinds of problems with marriage.

stevebethere said...

LMAO loved these heheh!

Have a quotetastic week :-)

Tony McGurk said...

All funny but Robin Williams gets my biggest laugh.

Brighid said...

Great ones all but BB has the best one. LOL

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Sandee, thank you for picking up my slack.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

edutcher, really?

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Steve, enjoy your week too.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Tony, Those are good alright.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Brighid, I like that one too, but she's in error. There's no such thing as bad oral sex.