Saturday, August 17, 2013

Polish ~OR~ Rule 5 Woodsterman Style


Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl.
(One of these is her? Oh, I had to get the babes in somewhere.)





Although his English was not perfect, they got along very well.
One day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him to arrange a divorce for him.
The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:

Have you any grounds?
Yes, an acre and half and nice little home.

No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?
It made of concrete.

I don't think you understand. Does either of you have a real grudge?
No, we have carport, and not need one.

I mean what are your relations like?
All my relations still in Poland .

Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.

Does your wife beat you up?
No, I always up before her.

Is your wife a nagger?
No, she white.

Why do you want this divorce?
She going to kill me.

What makes you think that?
I got proof.

What kind of proof?
She going to poison me.

She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom.
I can read English pretty good, and it say:




Thanks Dan ! 

  And here some utter Rule 5 ers:
 
 
Posted by at

24 comments:

  1. Reaganite IndependentAugust 17, 2013 at 3:26 AM

    Half of me is deeply offended

    It's either the stupid Irish side, or stupid Polish side... can't remember

    ReplyDelete
  2. LLAugust 17, 2013 at 5:22 AM

    I didn't see that one coming. But if it was one of those women, they'd kill you with kindness without the need for polish remover.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Randy-gAugust 17, 2013 at 5:38 AM

    That was outstanding! At least she wasn't a nagger...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Marine4everAugust 17, 2013 at 5:50 AM

    Thanks for getting the babes in, Odie!

    Sometimes you worry me... you'll put up a post and I'm thinking, "I know he could have put some babes in here! It doesn't matter that they've got nothing to do with what he's talking about... he coulda put some babe in here."

    ReplyDelete
  5. Woodsterman (Odie)August 17, 2013 at 6:24 AM

    RR, we here at Woodsterman pride ourselves on being equal opportunity offenders.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Woodsterman (Odie)August 17, 2013 at 6:25 AM

    LL, only Polish need worry.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Woodsterman (Odie)August 17, 2013 at 6:26 AM

    Randy, I know, I agonized for half a second on whether to use that.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Woodsterman (Odie)August 17, 2013 at 6:28 AM

    Marine, you'll never realize just how much I agonize over you getting your babe fix.

    ReplyDelete
  9. AdrienneAugust 17, 2013 at 8:14 AM

    Naggers are the worst!

    ReplyDelete
  10. SandeeAugust 17, 2013 at 9:49 AM

    He's not the brightest candle in the box is he? Bwahahahahahahaha.

    Have a fabulous weekend Odie. :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. Woodsterman (Odie)August 17, 2013 at 10:28 AM

    Adrienne, they can be.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Woodsterman (Odie)August 17, 2013 at 10:30 AM

    Sandee, candle? I don't remember candles.

    ReplyDelete
  13. USA_AdmiralAugust 17, 2013 at 12:43 PM

    That was one great joke.

    The images were too!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Woodsterman (Odie)August 17, 2013 at 2:00 PM

    Admiral, well of course, I have to keep my reputation going.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Mike aka ProofAugust 17, 2013 at 4:13 PM

    Some of those ladies look they they could be pole-ish dancers!

    ReplyDelete
  16. TeresaAugust 17, 2013 at 11:59 PM

    Loved it! funny stuff.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Woodsterman (Odie)August 18, 2013 at 6:08 AM

    Proof, I'm sure they danced a few Pols.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Woodsterman (Odie)August 18, 2013 at 6:09 AM

    Teresa, thank ye kindly.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Ron RussellAugust 18, 2013 at 10:51 AM

    Ha! Great joke and pretty girls, where's my beer!

    ReplyDelete
  20. edutcherAugust 18, 2013 at 11:02 AM

    He should tell him a little Pledge will restore him with one rub.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Woodsterman (Odie)August 18, 2013 at 11:18 AM

    Ron, sorry dude I drank it.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Woodsterman (Odie)August 18, 2013 at 11:20 AM

    Edutcher, really? I'll have to remember that and pass it on.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Reaganite IndependentSeptember 6, 2013 at 1:01 PM

    Linked:

    The Power of Headlines:
    MISS SWEDEN BIKINI 2013 (is Izabell Hahn)

    ReplyDelete
  24. Woodsterman (Odie)September 7, 2013 at 6:36 AM

    Thank You RR

    ReplyDelete

Put it here ... I can't wait to read it. I have the Captcha turned OFF but blogger insists it be there. You should be able to bypass it.

** Anonymous, please use a name at the end of your comment. You're all starting to look alike.

*** Moderation has been added due to Spam and a Commenter a little too caustic. I welcome comments, but talk of killing and racist (or even close to racist) are not welcome.

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