Tuesday, April 22, 2014

A Bridge In Texas



 One day, a very gentle Texas lady was driving across a high bridge in Austin .
 
      As she neared the top of the bridge, she noticed a young man fixin’ to jump.  ("fixin" in Texas means: has the means or abilities to take action)
 
      She stopped her car, rolled down the window and said, "Please don't jump! Think of your dear mother and father."
 
      He replied, "My mom and dad are both dead; I'm going to jump."
 
      She said, "Well, think of your sweet wife and precious children."
 
      He replied, "I'm not married, and I don't have any kids."
 
      She said, "Well, then you just remember the Alamo ."
 
      He replied, ''What's the Alamo ?''
 
      She replied, ‘’Well, bless your heart!  -- You just go ahead and jump you little Yankee Democrat Bastard... You’re holding up traffic!”

Thank You Trailbee ! 
Posted by at

24 comments:

  1. Randy-gApril 22, 2014 at 3:47 AM

    Jump!

    ReplyDelete
  2. USA_AdmiralApril 22, 2014 at 4:59 AM

    Jump! Jump!

    ReplyDelete
  3. LLApril 22, 2014 at 6:13 AM

    If he doesn't jump, he's a wimp. (wimp=Yankee Democrat Bastard)

    ReplyDelete
  4. prairie gopherApril 22, 2014 at 6:21 AM

    how about if we help with a little push. probably doesn't have the gonads to jump by himself!

    ReplyDelete
  5. AdrienneApril 22, 2014 at 7:04 AM

    I'm with Denis. A little help is in order.

    I remember when I first moved to Houston (I was 17) and was sitting in a restaurant/bar with some friends. The band started to play Dixie and everyone stood up. I was absolutely dumbfounded and had not a clue to why they were standing.

    One of my friends started hissing, "Stand up, stand up" and picking at my sleeve. This little soon-to-be ex-Yankee became a Texan that night.

    ReplyDelete
  6. JPDApril 22, 2014 at 7:08 AM

    "Real" Texas lady would have got out of the car, and "assisted" the young man in his "activity".

    ReplyDelete
  7. Woodsterman (Odie)April 22, 2014 at 7:35 AM

    Randy, damn tootin!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Woodsterman (Odie)April 22, 2014 at 7:36 AM

    Admiral, damn tootin tootin.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Woodsterman (Odie)April 22, 2014 at 8:06 AM

    LL, Democrat Wimp Bastard!

    ReplyDelete
  10. SandeeApril 22, 2014 at 8:06 AM

    Bwahahahahahahahaha. Yes, jump.

    Have a fabulous day Odie and thanks for the laugh. ☺

    ReplyDelete
  11. Woodsterman (Odie)April 22, 2014 at 8:07 AM

    denis, good idea. We'll take it under advisement ... yup push!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Woodsterman (Odie)April 22, 2014 at 8:09 AM

    Adrienne, congratulations Tex.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Woodsterman (Odie)April 22, 2014 at 8:11 AM

    John, I think you're right, the young lad needed a little help.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Woodsterman (Odie)April 22, 2014 at 8:12 AM

    Sandee, Yahoohoohooy

    ReplyDelete
  15. Marine4everApril 22, 2014 at 10:27 AM

    I love that little lady! BLESS HER HEART!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Woodsterman (Odie)April 22, 2014 at 11:24 AM

    Marine, everyone could learn from her.

    ReplyDelete
  17. edutcherApril 22, 2014 at 12:44 PM

    Even a Yankee knows the Alamo.

    It's them ignorant Lefties that don't.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Woodsterman (Odie)April 22, 2014 at 12:55 PM

    edutcher, can't argue with that.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Ron RussellApril 22, 2014 at 6:41 PM

    AMEN to that!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  20. stevierayvApril 22, 2014 at 8:17 PM

    Damn Yankees

    ReplyDelete
  21. BrigApril 22, 2014 at 9:36 PM

    Gotta love a Southern Lady with the wisdom to know when to push.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Woodsterman (Odie)April 23, 2014 at 7:07 AM

    Ron, you can't argue with success.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Woodsterman (Odie)April 23, 2014 at 7:08 AM

    stevierayv, damn tootin.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Woodsterman (Odie)April 23, 2014 at 7:10 AM

    Brighid, She is very wise indeed.

    ReplyDelete

Put it here ... I can't wait to read it. I have the Captcha turned OFF but blogger insists it be there. You should be able to bypass it.

** Anonymous, please use a name at the end of your comment. You're all starting to look alike.

*** Moderation has been added due to Spam and a Commenter a little too caustic. I welcome comments, but talk of killing and racist (or even close to racist) are not welcome.

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