Thursday, December 20, 2018
Wednesday, December 19, 2018
Tuesday, December 18, 2018
HYPNOTIST AT THE SENIOR CENTER
It was the Christmas Entertainment Night at the Senior Citizens' Center. Jim and I thought it would be great fun so we went. After the Christmas Carol sing along led by Alice at the piano, it was time for the star of the show. Claude the Hypnotist!
Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance. "Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time," said Claude.
The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew from his waistcoat pocket; a beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain.
"I want you to keep your eyes on this watch" said Claude, holding the watch high for all to see. "It is a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for six generations" said Claude.
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting "Watch the watch---watch the watch---watch the watch". We all became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth.
The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming surfaces. A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of gently swaying watch. They were all hypnotized.
And then suddenly, the chain broke!!! The beautiful watch fell to the stage and burst apart on impact.
"SHIT" said Claude.
It took three days to clean up Jim and I and the Senior Citizens' Center. And Claude was never invited back again.
***********************
Poor Jim, you see he sent this to me. What better way to
reward him than to make him part of the post.
Sorry Jim ... and Thanks!
Monday, December 17, 2018
Sunday, December 16, 2018
Saturday, December 15, 2018
Friday, December 14, 2018
Thursday, December 13, 2018
Seductive Cocktails
While enjoying their evening cocktails, the wife asks her husband, in very seductive voice, "Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?"
"No," said her husband.
She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top 3 or 4 buttons of her blouse, and slowly reached down into the cleavage created by a soft, silky push-up bra, and pulled out a crumpled Twenty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Twenty Dollar bill from her and smiled approvingly.
She then asked him, "Have you ever seen Fifty Dollars all crumpled up?"
"Uh... no, I haven't," he said, with an anxious tone in his voice.
She gave him another sexy little smile, pulled up her skirt, and seductively reached into her panties...... and pulled out a crumpled Fifty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Fifty Dollar bill and started breathing a little quicker with anticipation.
"Now," she said, "have you ever seen Fifty Thousand Dollars all crumpled up?"
He said, "No!", trying to contain his excitement.
She said, "Check the garage."
Thanks Jim
Wednesday, December 12, 2018
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