Sunday, August 31, 2014

Saturday, August 30, 2014

Playing Poker ~OR~ Rule 5 Woodsterman Style

Two couples were playing poker one evening. Jim accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed Lee’s wife, Sue, wasn’t wearing any underwear. Shocked by this, Jim upon trying to sit back up again, hit his head on the table and emerged red-faced.
Later, Jim went to the kitchen to get some refreshments. Lee’s wife, Sue, followed and asked, ‘Did you see anything that you like under there?’ Surprised by her boldness, Jim admitted that, he did. Sue said, ‘Well, you can have it but it will cost you $250.’
Jim confirmed that he is very interested. Sue told him that since her husband Lee played golf Friday afternoons and Jim didn’t, Jim should be at her house around 2 p.m. Friday afternoon.
When Friday rolled around, Jim showed up at Lee’s house at 2 p.m. sharp and after paying Sue the agreed sum, they went to the bedroom, and Sue gave him a great time.Jim quickly dressed and left.
As usual, Lee came home from golf at 6 p.m. and upon arriving, asked his wife: ‘Did Jim come by the house this afternoon?’
With a lump in her throat Sue answered, ‘Why yes, he did stop by for a few minutes this afternoon.’ Her heart nearly skipped a beat when her husband curtly asked, ‘Did he give you $250?
Sue, using her best poker face, replied, ‘Well, yes, in fact he did.’
Lee, with a satisfied look on his face, continued, ‘Good. He came by the golf club this morning and borrowed $250 from me. He promised he’d stop by this afternoon and pay it back.’
Now THAT, my friends, is how poker should be played…

 Thanks Dan!

Other Poker Playing Rule 5 ers:

Friday, August 29, 2014

Thursday, August 28, 2014


• Our Phones – Wireless
• Cooking – Fireless
• Cars – Keyless
• Food  – Fatless
• Tires  – Tubeless
• Dress – Sleeveless
• Youth – Jobless
• Leaders –  Shameless
• Relationships – Meaningless
• Attitudes –  Careless
• Babies – Fatherless
• Feelings –  Heartless
• Education – Valueless
• Children –  Mannerless
• Country – Godless

Congress is CLUELESS,

And our President is WORTHLESS!

I'm scared - Shitless 

Thanks Trailbee! 

Well, the arts and crafts season ends this 
Labor Day Weekend for us. Maybe I can
make my blogging friends rounds as I should.

Been busy with four weekends in a row,
and only have three days to replace
the inventory in between them.

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Camping With The Toughest Cowboy

Some old cowboys were seated around the campfire out on 
the lonesome prairie, and with the pride for which these men 
were famous, it was a night of bravado, rot gut whiskey, 
and many tall tales...
Frank, the hand from Wyoming says, "I must be the strongest, 
meanest, toughest cowboy there is.

Why, just the other day, a bull got loose in the corral. It had
gored six men before I wrestled it to the ground by the horns 
with my bare hands and castrated that sucker with my teeth."
Snake River Ben, from Idaho, couldn't stand to be bested. 
"That's nothing, I was walking down the trail yesterday 
and a 15 foot diamondback rattler slid out from 
under a rock and made a move for me.

I grabbed that bastard with my bare hands, bit off its head, 
and sucked the poison down in one gulp - 
didn't even get a belly ache."
Old Red River Tom, the cowboy from Texas, 
remained silent, slowly stirring the
campfire coals with his pecker...

Thank You Trailbee!

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Monday, August 25, 2014

Friday, August 22, 2014

More Adventures of the Lone Ranger

The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a saloon and sat down to drink
a beer.
    After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said "Who Owns
the big white horse outside?" The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his
gun belt, and said, "I do....Why?"

      The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger and said, "I just thought you'd
like to know that your horse is about dead outside!"

     The Lone Ranger and Tonto rushed outside and sure enough Silver was
ready to die from heat exhaustion. The Lone Ranger got the horse
water and soon Silver was starting to feel a little better.

    The Lone Ranger turned to Tonto and said, "Tonto, I want you to run
around Silver and see if you can create enough of a breeze to make
him start to feel better."

      Tonto said, "Sure, Kemosabe" and took off running circles around Silver.

     Not able to do anything else but wait, the Lone Ranger returned to
the saloon to finish his drink. A few minutes later, another cowboy
struts into the bar and asks,"Who owns that big white horse
outside?" The Lone Ranger stands again, and claims, "I do, what's
wrong with him This time?"

     The cowboy looks him in the eye and says,

         (...I JUST LOVE THIS PART....)

     "Nothing, but you left your injun runnin!"

Thanks Trailbee!

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Wednesday, August 20, 2014


Brains of elderly are slow because they know so much....
By Sarah Knapton, Science Correspondent
Older people do not decline mentally with age, it just takes  them longer to recall facts because they have more information in their brains,  scientists believe. Much like a computer struggles as the hard drive gets full up, so too do humans take longer to access information, it has been suggested
Researchers say this slowing down it is not the same as  cognitive decline. The human brain works slower in old age,” said Dr. Michael Ramscar, “but only because we have stored more information over time “The brains of older people do not get weak. On the contrary,  they simply know more.”
Also, older people often go to another room to get something  and when they get there, they stand there wondering what they came for. It  is NOT a memory problem, it is nature's way of making older people do more  exercise.

SO THERE!! We Are All Brilliant!
Thank You Mr. Trailbee! 

I Be Old But I be cool!

Monday, August 18, 2014

RedNeckishness ........ That 4 Thing

Thank You Trailbee

The show is over and two more to go. Life is a bit hectic around
here, so forgive my sporadic appearances around the internet.  

Sunday, August 17, 2014

RedNeckishness ........ Tres

Again we have a show going this weekend, so this is preposted.

Thanks Again Trailbee!

Saturday, August 16, 2014

Retirement Job ~OR~ Rule 5 Woodsterman Style

Since I retired, I have been searching for
that "just right" volunteer job. I just wanted

to give back to the community a little

something. I have looked around a long time

& think I might have found it. It had

to be one where I didn't feel like it was a

chore.  Something enjoyable. Something

a little different from the ordinary day-in,

day-out routine. At last I am truly comfort-

able being a volunteer. I no longer feel

like my talents are being wasted on

non-meaning, irrelevant trivialities. I feel

good again.

I have found the perfect retirement job ...

Thanks Trailbee (Again you're going to get me in trouble)

Other Escorting Rule 5 ers:

Friday, August 15, 2014

More British Humour ... Bungee Jumping

**********FRIDAY BONUS**********
 Thank You Trailbee!

Thursday, August 14, 2014