Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Walking Eagle

President BARACK OBAMA was invited to address a major gathering of the American Indian Nation in upstate New York ..
He spoke for almost an hour about his plans for increasing every Native American's present standard of living. He referred to his time as a U.S. Senator and how he had voted for every Native American issue that came to the floor of the Senate.
Although President Obama was vague about the details of his plans, he seemed most enthusiastic and spoke eloquently about his ideas for helping his "red sisters and brothers."

At the conclusion of his speech, the Tribes presented Obama with a plaque inscribed with his new Indian name, "Walking Eagle."

The proud President Obama accepted the plaque and then departed in his motorcade to a fundraiser, waving to the crowds.

A news reporter later asked the group of chiefs how they came to select the new name they had given to the President.
They explained that "Walking Eagle" is the name given to a bird so full of shit it can no longer fly.


*HUMPDAY BONUS . . . 

Direct Quote from "Larry, the Cable Guy"

"Even after the Super Bowl victory of the New Orleans Saints, 
I have noticed a large number of people implying with 
bad jokes that Cajuns aren't smart. I would like to 
state for the record that I disagree with that assessment. 
Anybody that would build a city 5 feet below sea level in a hurricane 
zone and fill it with Democrats that can't swim is a damn genius".

Monday, August 29, 2011

Is This A Vision Randy ?


While visiting our blogging buddy Randy's Blog
I was given a vision . . . You just never know.
Click HERE to try your luck at Randy's Roundtable

Sunday, August 28, 2011

The Atlanta Air Show


 
 
 Some aircraft just get more beautiful with age!!!!

This Is Worth Seeing !

Hat/Tip to Stopsign at Lonely is the Nights

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Barber Shop ~ OR ~ Rule 5 Woodsterman Style

  
This is an actual men's barbershop in Poland ..  
Owned by women...
And they say women are not smarter than men?




Be honest:


If this barbershop was in your community

How many haircuts would you get a month?

Thanks David !

Friday, August 26, 2011

NewsBusted 8/26/11 ~ NewsBusters.org (Again?)


This is a repost of the repost ... or something like that.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

This Just In . . . Earthquake Update


Reports of the devastation keep coming in.
The latest photo below:
BREAKING NEWS: President Obama has just confirmed that the DC earthquake occurred on a rare and obscure fault-line, apparently known as "Bush's Fault". Obama also announced that the Secret Service and Maxine Waters continues an investigation of the quake's suspicious ties to the Tea Party. Conservatives however have proven that it was caused by the founding fathers rolling over in their graves. (Stolen from a former student's email).
 

From Chuck S. by way of Allison (H/T)
Photo stolen from The War Planner (H/T)


Dog's Face . . .



IT'S ALL ABOUT THE LOOK ON THIS DOG'S FACE!
HELL YES I'M GONNA SNIFF IT, IT'S WHAT I DO!

Thanks David !

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Blond Phone Call

"Hi Mom, How are you?"

"Hi Sally, where are you? I thought you were with your father at the Ace Hardware"

"Yeah we were, but I got arrested, and they've let me make one phone call"

"What happened?"

"Oh, I punched this African-American woman in the head."

"What on earth, why did you do that?"

"Well it wasn't my fault. Dad told me to find a Black & Decker."

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

NewsBusted 8/23/11 ~ NewsBusters.org (Again)


This is not the same video as first posted. Someone 
somewhere didn't like the first one I guess.

Monday, August 22, 2011

Spot The Cat !!!


If you can spot it within 15 seconds then you are great......
So obvious once you find it  … so frustrating when you can’t!!!
PS: The answer is HERE if you absolutely must!


Saturday, August 20, 2011

Entrepreneur ~ OR ~ Rule 5 Woodsterman Style

This girl could be sitting at home drawing unemployment.
Instead she's established a business with unlimited potential 
for expansion. A creative entrepreneur who has developed 
a business idea.
She is selling margaritas on the beach 
(clearing $1250.00 per day)...

The jobs ARE out there folks!!!!

Friday, August 19, 2011

NewsBusted 8/19/11 ~ NewsBusters.org


Have to run ... Show in Tahoe City this weekend.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Politically Incorrect


I had just come out of the store with two porterhouse steaks, a jumbo
sausage, a bag of chips, and a 6-pack of beer. A homeless man sat
there and said, "I haven't eaten for two days."
I told him, "I wish I had your frickin' will power."
 
Top tip: if you're camping in the summer and the attractive girl in
the next tent tells you that because it's so hot she will be sleeping
with her flaps open, it's not necessarily an invitation to casual sex. 
Wish me luck.....I appear in court next Monday.

A fat girl served me food in McDonalds at lunch time. She said, 'sorry
about the wait.' I said, 'don't worry, you're bound to lose it
eventually.'
 
I was behind a rather large woman at the checkout. 
She had on a pair of jeans that said, 'Guess.'
So, I said, "I don't know........maybe 350 pounds."
 
Snow in the forecast! The TV weather gal said she was expecting 8
inches tonight, I thought to myself "fat chance with a face like
that!"
 
I have a new pick up line that works every time! It doesn't matter how
gorgeous or out of my league a woman might be, this line is a winner
and always end up in bed with them. Here's how it goes, "Excuse me
love, could I ask your opinion?  Does this damp cloth smell like
chloroform to you?"
 
Years ago it was suggested 'that an apple a day kept the doctor 
away..'   But since  many 
doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon
sandwich works best.
 
I took my Biology exam last Friday. I was asked to name two things
commonly found in cells. Apparently Blacks and Mexicans were not the
correct answers.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

NewsBusted 8/16/11 ~ NewsBusters.org


As Promised, I've been absent as of late. Still trying
to act like a rich Republican by selling my wares at
the local arts and craft shows. I'm not fooling anyone
about being a rich Republican though. I'm not visiting
your blogs as often as I like. After Labor Day Weekend
things will slow down to a crawl. Then I can return to
my old obnoxious self. For a peek about what I'm
talking about, you new readers, check on "Why I Am
Called Woodsterman" above.

Monday, August 15, 2011

New Dollar Bill

The Treasury Department has issued a new dollar bill 
to reflect the state of the economy.
ALSO THIS:
Save Money and the Environment:
Buy a new Smart Car!
 Below is a Photo of An  Accident Near
New  Orleans Involving Two Trucks And  A Smart Car
at less than 10  MPH.
I Think I'll Pass On  Saving Gas;
I'd Rather Save My  Ass.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Just Git 'er Done . . . Too

These men are all finalists in the "Just Git 'er Done" contest.
We can only hope they survive until the awards ceremony.



Thanks David !

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Just Git 'er Done

These men are all finalists in the "Just Git 'er Done" contest.
We can only hope they survive until the awards ceremony.




Thanks David !

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Montana Bear Tragedy

This is a very sad story about a bear. Everybody should heed 
the warning to not feed wildlife because they become dependent 
and cannot forage for themselves anymore. This is such a 
tragedy to see what they have done to our country's wildlife! 
The photo below captures a disturbing trend that is beginning 
to affect U.S. wildlife. . . .
Animals that were formerly self-sufficient are now showing 
signs of belonging to the Democratic Party...... as they have
apparently learned to just sit on their ass and wait for the government 
to step in and provide for their care and sustenance.
This photo is of a Democrat black bear in Montana nicknamed: 
Bearock Bearama.

Thanks David !

Monday, August 8, 2011

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Fellow Woodworker and Humorist ... Go Figure

I don't know how many of you have discovered Lee,
but he's an accomplished Woodworker and great 
humorist as seen here. You can find him at his Blog
and on Facebook.

Hat/Tip to Lee Vanden Brink

A Sign of the Times . . . Three







Saturday, August 6, 2011

Will the Dollar Fall OR Rule5 Woodsterman Style

I posted this because I know you're interested in finance.


TO MY FINANCIALLY FOCUSED FRIENDS:
 

The Question of the Day is...   





Will the Dollar fall or not?

Always remember,

The Key to Financial Survival is to be a Tight Ass!

YOU DON’T HAVE TO THANK ME, REALLY—IT’S POSTED OUT OF FRIENDSHIP AND CONCERN FOR 
YOUR FINANCIAL WELL BEING.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Retirement Bonus

The Navy found they had too many officers and decided to offer an 
early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who volunteered 
for Retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a 
straight line between any Two points in his body. The officer got to 
choose what those two points would be. The first officer who accepted 
asked that he be measured from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. 
He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of $72,000.
 
The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be 
measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked 
out with $96,000. 

The third one was a non-commissioned officer, a 
grizzly old Chief who, when asked where he would like to be measured 
replied, 'From the tip of my weenie to my testicles.' It was suggested by 
the pension man that he might want to reconsider, explaining about the 
nice big checks the previous two Officers had received. But the old 
Chief insisted and they decided to go along with him providing the 
 measurement was taken by a Medical Officer.

The Medical Officer arrived and instructed the Chief to 'drop 'em,' 
which he did. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip 
of the Chief's weenie and began to work back. "Dear Lord!", he 
suddenly exclaimed,''Where are your testicles?''
The old Chief calmly replied, ''Vietnam''.

Monday, August 1, 2011