Thursday, January 6, 2011

YEAR END RESULTS FROM TSA AIRPORT SCREENINGS

Year to date statistics on Airport screening from the 
Department of Homeland Security

Transvestites                                  133

Hernia’s                                        1,485

Hemorrhoid Cases                        3,172

Enlarged Prostates                        8,249

Breast Implants                             59,350

Natural Blondes                             3

Terrorist Plots Discovered           0

28 comments:

  1. Wow, three natural blondes, Sounds high to me!

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  2. Righty, that's because they checked all blondes.

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  3. It makes me proud to be an official US Government taxpayer.

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  4. LL, we can all hold our heads up high this day!

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  5. Christopher, I personally believe it's about looking for natural blondes.

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  6. I'm a natural blonde, but believe me, the guys at the TSA weren't eying me.

    Or maybe they were. I don't care to know about that....

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  7. good garsh did they find brain matter in the lefties by any chance?..lol

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  8. OK OK I confess I'm not a Natural Blonde.

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  9. I just don't know what to say...

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  10. Odie getting to the heart of the matter: priceless.

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  11. Perhaps we can use iron filings and scotch tape to make interesting coments on various parts of our bodies. Give the TSA lads some reading material while searching for implants.

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  12. Stopsign, I love it when a not-so natural blonde gets in the spirit of things.

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  13. Fuzzy, we do our best around here ... see what you were missing?

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  14. I was missing soooo much! :(

    I blame you. And George Bush.

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  15. Sig94, kind of a grown-up dress up party huh.

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  16. Great success. If only every gubmint program were this full of win.

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  17. I am surprised how high the natural blond number is and how low the hernia number is. Take a walk through Wal Mart and you will see why I think the hernia number is low.

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  18. Admiral, so you want me to go through WalMart and check for Hernias. Why not ... I'll probably fit right in.

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Put it here ... I can't wait to read it.