Saturday, July 24, 2010

Ramblings of a Retired Mind

I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those 
cell phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. 
I can't afford one. So, I'm wearing my garage door opener.

I also made a cover for my hearing aid and now I have 
what they call blue teeth, I think.

You know, I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized 
that people didn't like me anyway.

I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing 
husbands on beer cans!


I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is
'when you still have something on the ball, but you are 
just too tired to bounce it.'

I thought about making a fitness movie for folks my age, 
and call it 'Pumping Rust'.

I've gotten that dreaded furniture disease. That's when 
your chest is falling into your drawers!

When people see a cat's litter box, they always say, 
'Oh, have you got a cat?' Just once I want to say, 'No, 
it's for company!'

Employment application blanks always ask who is to 
be notified in case of an emergency.   I think you should 
write, 'A Good Doctor'!

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible 
a whole lot more as they get older.  Then, it dawned on me.  
They were cramming for their finals.

As for me, I'm just hoping God grades on the curve.

4 comments:

Kristin said...

All this and your souped-up car. You are some kind of cool!

Supi said...

Thanks Odie. I love the idea of writing in A good doctor.

Opus #6 said...

Cramming for finals. Ha!

Amusing Bunni said...

That was funny, Odie....you are not old!

Have a great weekend.